We’ve all been there… we set a goal, even ticked off all the required actions in the “To-Do” list. Only to see that we’ve gotten nowhere in its manifestation. Nowhere. And that might even be a lucky scenario. Many times, we might even feel we’ve actually regressed – feeling worse of than when we started!
Yet, we’ve seen many others successfully reaching their desires. A few one-of-a-kind fellow human beings may even have been HAPPY not only -landing- the goal, but on the -journey- itself. How can we be like these “one-of-a-kind” of souls too?
Guess what. We all have been in the exact position as those “extraordinary” people.
Think of it. Go as far back as childhood. You -will- find a time when you got something you really wanted without striving like crazy to get it.
I remember when I was about 13 years old, I wanted a pair of Reebok shoes. I didn’t have enough savings to buy myself a pair. Another “setback” was I knew my super-strict parents would NEVER for the life of them, consider getting one for me.
Still, it was something I imagined having, feeling content as I daydreamed about wearing them, walking in them, running in them, doing our Physical Education class in them.
Then one day, my uncle and aunt invited me shopping with their daughter. Now – it was like the ONLY time they’ve ever brought me shopping. Because my parents – for all the differences and fighting they did – never believed in spoiling kids. So shopping was a very rare event with my either of my parents. Let alone with my relatives!
You probably can tell I was a very, very quiet teen. It was very, very rare that I would mention to any adult about my wants and desires.
Believe it or not, when we were at the department store, my cousin wanted to look at shoes. SPORTS SHOES!
As she looked for what she liked, a pair of white Reeboks with light blue lining on the top shelf stared down at me. I stared back up at it. I was too shy and quiet to ask for it.
The funniest thing was, my uncle and aunt whom I wasn’t particularly close to – saw my unmoving gaze.
They talked between themselves, then turned around and asked me, “Do you want those shoes?”
I nodded quietly, without saying a word. They wouldn’t have known I was jumping in joy laughing “YES!” inside. What a treat!
I didn’t know anything about the art of manifestation then. I didn’t know we had such power to create our reality then.
Looking back, I realize I got what I wanted simply because I didn’t put up barriers about receiving it. Plus, I was clear in my wanting of it. And I was clear about the delight I would receive from them – before – they became a reality. I also didn’t limit myself to HOW I would receive them. And whenever I thought about those shoes, I was in a state of being neutral or looking-forwardness before it actualized. I wasn’t upset that it hadn’t happened.
The point of this story is this:
YOU too, have had a similar experience at some point of your life. YOU too, are able to recall specific incidents when you received something that you wanted when it was very smooth and painless.
Simply because you didn’t put up a huge fight INTERNALLY to have it, or excuses why you think you shouldn’t have it.
Fast forward to today, I feel blessed to say I have learned a little more about actualizing our hearts’ desires and I can name a few of my core desires that have come true. The biggest of which is being able to love my mother whom I vehemently rejected and resented for so-called messing up my childhood.
Yes it’s a great eventuality, but not without some conscious inner work. More on this in a later post.
So why is it that sometimes, we get what we desire easily, and sometimes, no matter how hard we try, even if we’re doing “all the right things” and do BEYOND all that, we STILL don’t seem to be able to get any closer to having that promotion, that relationship, that car, etc?
The biggest reason of all, in my experience, is that not ALL aspects of ourselves line up with the receiving of it. Meaning…
We have different aspects of self, and sometimes parts of us conflict with each other. That’s why we seem to have different voices or thinking about the same thing.
So while it’s clear to us that there is a part of us that really wants that desire (esp the part of us that THINKS we want it), another part doesn’t want to have it, is afraid, is not ready, is not convinced it’s the best thing for you. It’s like an undercurrent that’s running against the direction you are steering your boat to go. And here’s the tricky bit – that we may or may not be aware of.
Imagine how do these conflicting thoughts make us feel inside if they keep playing over and over again?
You may be saying, “Confused. Overwhelmed. Frustrated.”
You got it.
And what happens when we make a decision feeling this way? We give a mixed signal as to whether we want that thing we thought we want, so in the end, the visible external outcome gets muddled too.
So how do we ALIGN all aspects of ourselves to what we want?
Let’s start with awareness. We did some of that above. Let’s bring more awareness in the next article.
For awareness is the very first step in catalyzing INTENTIONAL change.