A few years ago, my hubby was in the shower happily singing at the top of his lungs. It was his one-of-a-kind rendition of “Can’t Help Falling In Love with You.”
As he stepped out of the bathroom, he said to me with such big, earnest eyes, something I’ll never forget.
“I know I can’t sing, but I want to sing. Only for you.
“I can’t sing?”
A second’s pause.
A part of me reluctantly agreed as I heard one thought in my head go, “Uhm, it is out of tune by most standards.”
But I couldn’t bear to say that and break his heart. Not this heart-melting moment!
Instead, I looked at him and said, “I love how you love me.”
As you can see, I refused to vocalize the former thought in my head and tell my hubby the same. Because I was simply MELTING with his love for me. The love that I felt from him for me was so deep that it overpowered any cringes my critical self felt for him singing out of tune.
If you too have had a couple of years of music training and have a partner who can’t keep in tune, I’d say just put on your earmuffs and simply watch with your eyes, and listen to your partner with your heart. Let the vibes of how HAPPY he was singing travel to your heart and ears.
As I “tuned in” to his happiness, I was then able to hear clearly that he really was POURING his love into each and very word of his version of the lyrics. His unwavering love and commitment to our relationship was crystal clear.
I’m so happy I never put him down for his singing for all 6+ years of our marriage.
Because I’ve always felt the ENERGY of his love for me clearly UNDERLYING and BACKING UP his serenades. That’s off the charts! I just feel so fortunate that any guy would still be madly, unreservedly in love with his partner after 6+ years!
The reward for me in tuning out his off-keyness? He can feel free continue to sing his heart out to this day and fill his lungs and himself with pure glee and happiness. I get to be a receiver of his pure joy! And be the happy receiver of his love.
Why am I sharing with you about this “little” event?
Because it’s one thing to simply say, “Focus on what brings you peace, joy or whatever you truly desire, so that you can create a more joyful life.” And another thing to actually SHOW you via real examples of what this REALLY means.
You see, you gotta be on the LOOKOUT for opportunities to create more peace or joy in ordinary everyday life, so that you can then SEIZE them and make it even more peaceful or joyful for you and thus for others as well.
My hubby’s singing in the shower is just a simple example of how we may at times focus on some thing’s or some one’s imperfections instead of focusing on its/his beauty underlying his rendition.
I know my past self would not have let the out-of-tuneness go so easily in the past. I would not have made peace with it quickly. I would’ve been annoyed and said to my loved one, “Can you please STOP singing? It hurts my ears!”
Plus – more importantly – I would’ve killed off a beautiful moment as it was getting ready to bloom right in its tracks. And probably killed all other future opportunities for my hubby to profess his love for me in such a melting way EVER again.
I’m just delighted to watch him be so gleeful simply by singing. I LOVE how easily he CAN be happy, just like that. I love watching his face all lit up, you know? 🙂
So in us both aligning our individual and collective happiness in his singing at the same time, harmony between between both of us gets jacked up. Big time. Without a need for getting some expensive or laborious gift for each other.
Listen up, look out for beauty, my friends. You WILL find it, when you consciously have your eyes, ears and heart open for it.
There’s such power in listening to the voice of our own true heart. Our heart knows, sees, and loves beauty.
Oh, and here’s something else that really tickles me that I wanna share with you.
My husband finally told me after about 4 years into our marriage, “When you first cooked for me a few years ago, it was tasteless.”
My heart sank a little, but I knew he was going to say something to more than make up for it.
He continued, “But it was still SOOO good. Because I felt all your love in it for me.“
The point again?
Come to peace first within yourself about the other person’s imperfection and peace with another will follow.