In our last post, we talked about being aware of the different aspects of our self – that may be going in direction opposite to where you thought you wanted to go.
So the question is, how can we get more or ALL of our different selves pointing towards the same desire that we consciously put out? And with more joy – as you know was meant to be?
One very effective way to align ourselves, is to focus on what we want, rather than what we don’t want.
You may be saying, “What? Isn’t that what I’ve been doing?”
Here’s an example of what it REALLY means to focus on what we want rather than what we don’t want.
Say you feel tired easily. Even going to the supermarket makes you tired. You’ve tried all kinds of diets and talked to a gazillion experts. You’ve even stuck religiously to the month-long or even 6-month program.
Some tiredness comes off at the end of the program – yay – but it’s short-lived. Some how, it manages to find its way back again.
You ask WHY #$@%!!!
Good. You are able to acknowledge upfront to yourself that you’re frustrated. Much better than denying your feelings about it.
Then ask WHY again. This time in a state of calm reflection. Note – without the #$@%!!!
(Oh shucks writing the #$@%!!! has the potential to make you focus on the emotional #$@%!!! charge even more, so I’ll stop now.)
So, back to the key question.
WHY do you really want more energy in your body?
In working with people, I find very often, people say, “Because I -don’t- want to be tired anymore!”
Right. I heard you. However pay attention to the image you get in your mind when you read that.
Here’s the picture in my mind when people tell me they DON’T want to be tired – an image of them being dull and tired! Did you get the same picture in your head?
And how does that image make you feel when you see it flashed in your mind? Tired right?
Then I rephrase. “So what IS it that you want?”
Sometimes they get startled. Because they know I’ve understood where they’re coming from so why am I asking the same question again?
So being the sensitive heart-centered person that they are, they will reply politely in a neutral tone,
“Well… I DON’T want to be tired.”
I say, “Ok… you’ve just been saying what you DON’T want. We’re very clear on that. The question is different … it is – what DO you want?”
Sometimes I offer an example, “Maybe you want more energy in your body? You want to feel yourself come ALIVE?
[Pause… something is clicking in their minds…]
“Ohhhh…. “ they’ll say. Got it!
See how the image of what you want has changed to something that feels more uplifting simply by focusing on ALIVENESS, ie being CLEAR about what you DO want?
Remember, the brain will find a way to reproduce circumstances that matches up with the image you have given it. Images that are associated with feelings, are boosted up the prioritization list of actualization.
Meaning… emotionally charged images that we give to our minds are potent. Doesn’t matter if it’s an image or emotion that you like or don’t. The more intense the emotion that accompanies the image, the more the chances of it being realized in physical every day life.
Wait a minute, you say. But I do run through in my head images of what I do want.
Yes you do.
We’re talking about the “balance” of all the images with emotions – including the images that we’re not aware of.
It kinda goes like this.
If you think one thought about the topic of health now that gives you peace (eg by imagining how it feels to be alive), but then the next moment you think of a thought about your health that makes you feel frustrated (eg by reminding yourself how tired you are), they kinda “cancel” out each other.
So what now?
I’d say, become more picky about the thoughts you want to think. The kinds that make you authentically more at peace with your life and your self EXACTLY as it stands. Even though these thoughts may have initially no seeming connection with the topic of your desire, the very state of being more at ease in general, will invite new ideas, new possibilities into your life. And likely lead you to your next best step relating to your topic of desire.
So DECIDE to notice what already makes you feel appreciative, at peace, joyful, etc. Do it TODAY. A great way to start is simply to start writing down what you already appreciate about your life.
Be persistent, and you will find doors opening for you in delightful, surprising ways.